Playlist: "WIP Summer"

It is currently raining. I have spend the past hour drilling assumption questions for my upcoming LSAT examination. Or, better said, I more or less wasted an hour because I could not be bothered to make sure I was putting my answers in the correct area.

Anyways, this summer has been a surreal and strange experience for me. In the final days of Spring, I was told that I needed to welcome change into my life in order to be a more complete person. So, I have been trying to improve myself. I tell myself to...Be more willing to try new things! Be less egotistical! Be more humble! Be more positive! Do not overthink silly nonsense! Be more present! Do not beat yourself up! Work harder! Do not be apathetic! 

Although this is a well-meaning endeavor, I have had to endure some awkward situations of me leaving my safety net or peer pressure. Which is not necessarily bad but different.

On the other side, I feel like the distinction between the girl I was in my teens and the girl who is currently in her twenties is more apparent. I am less angsty and insecure however, there is more to be done before I am to become a Totally Together Woman. (TTW)

The best way for me to characterize this Summer (2016) is a season where everything is Work in Progress (WIP). Whether it is me bettering myself, or me building the skills to do my best for my LSAT. And, the music that I have been listening to definitely fits into that theme.

Without further ado, I prepared a playlist of songs that I am currently listening to that characterizes my summer. I hope you enjoy!

(Also the artwork's image is open to the public domain. I did this strategically because your homegirl does not want to get sued!)

You can listen to it on Spotify

<3

- Vianey 

Best Songs of 2015

2015 was a great year in music! I spent a lot of time on Spotify discover new songs, new artists. A lot of my faves released new music. And, mainstream songs crushed it!!

As to anything music related, I like to compile a playlist. Here are in my humble opinion the best songs of 2015.

The songs are in no particular order, however in order for them to be featured in this playlist they had to be released in 2015. Make sure to hit shuffle.

(I am more than willing to update it with suggestions with you guys, or if more songs get released. Here is looking at you Kanye. When are you going to release your new album? Did you collaborate with Paul McCartney for more songs?)

<3

- Vianey

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every now and then on Kaleidehscope.

Trying to Become a Totally Together Woman

My twentieth birthday happened today! (10/20) I am no longer a teenager and it is terrifying! I am unable to use the excuses of “teen angst” or “I’m a teen and I’m figuring it out” without getting weird looks from other fellow adults. 

Therefore, I compiled a list of twenty things I have yet to learn or accept into my life. I cannot stress how important it is for me to learn this soon for the sake of becoming a well-adjusted adult within society. (A.K.A. Becoming a Totally Together Girl Woman (TTW)) In addition, I think that the casual depiction of the rare flaws in my behavior, quirks, or attitude, are pretty universal. Perhaps even relatable. Hopefully, this list provides introspection and makes you realize what you need to do to get it together. 

Without further ado, I Need to Know How To…

1. Be More Confident

As much as I brag about being a boss bitch from hell that does not let anything crush her, I am not the most confident gal in the bunch. Being perfectly candid, there is a gender bias to my lack of confidence. Women are more likely to receive a negative connotation when they want something. Personally, it scares me being thought of as aggressive or annoying. However, nothing would get done if it weren’t for confident people. I need to learn how to embrace terms like aggressive and annoying if I plan to break through this patriarchal society. In addition, one day I plan on becoming someone that little girls aspire to become. I cannot imagine Justice Sandra Day O’Connor or Stevie Nicks being afraid of coming across as aggressive or annoying. So, why am I?

2. Network(/ Make Friends)

Networking is the most necessary evil. I, personally, see networking as using people to advance your career or your personal life. Feel free to disagree. However, I do not know how to appear cool when I have secret ulterior motives towards building a relationship with someone. Making new friends is not all that different from networking. They are one of the same. You can totally use your friends to advance your life! So, how do you make yourself cool enough so that people are willing to help you out? I’m asking for a friend. 

3. Do My Taxes

Why don’t they teach us the process of doing our taxes in high school? Learning this topic is vital if we plan on becoming law-abiding members of society. I do not want to move away from my parents house because the responsibility of doing my taxes would be too overwhelming. What if I do them wrong? I need to learn how to do this before I head out to law school. 

4. Wake Up Early Without Hitting Snooze

I hit snooze so much, it could be considered bullying. I need to get into the habit of waking up and staying up. Lately, my bed seduces me back to sleep until I am late for everything. How am I to have responsibilities when I can not even get up?

5. Take Aesthetically Pleasing Pictures

I envy people that have killer Instagram pages. I wish my world could look as magnificent as theirs. For the purposes of bragging about my pretty life, I want to learn how to take aesthetically pleasing pictures. In addition, I want to have the capability of taking a perfect shot in the first try. Not how I take pictures lately by taking fifty pictures in the hopes of getting a perfect shot within the crappy ones…A girl can only dream.

6. Be Honest Without Being Blunt

When I was younger, I was a big fat liar. Nowadays, I do not like to lie unless I absolutely have to. (That is what liars say so that they won’t feel bad when they resort to lying.) However, sometimes when I am being too candid, I come across as rude and blunt. I want to learn what the sweet spot between honesty and kindness is so that I can gain a reputation as a sincere woman. 

7. Not Lose Hope When Someone Cannot Hang Out With Me

Like any normal human being, I get extremely anxious whenever I make plans with someone. If I really want to become close with that person, my expectations rise high. I will get really excited to make plans because I am most likely in friend love with them. However, if they cannot hang out with me because they have a lot going on in their lives, ugly thoughts cloud my mind. I will assume that this person does not like me. And, I will be hesitant to befriend them.

I do not like that I let my insecurities prevent me from becoming close with someone. For that reason, I need to learn how to not lose hope and compromise. If I want something, I need to at least try.

8. Not Let Stress Overwhelm Me

Staying cool, calm, and collected has never been my forte. If stress becomes too overbearing, I will not be able to control my emotions. There will be tears, screams, and hyperventilation. When there shouldn’t be. I need to listen to Frankie and relax.

9. Be Able to Work Without Stress

I will make a ton of excuses for the sake of procrastinating. I cannot work without stress. I need to change that for my sake. I need to learn how to time manage and be able to work effectively through that system.

10. Be Healthy and Stay Healthy

Health is important. One must maintain it, at a very bothersome cost. This year I’ve gone through various fluctuating periods were I was trying to be healthy and I would later stop caring. Then the cycle would repeat the next month after the next. 

When there is no motivation to try, I lose interest. I need to be able to maintain my health. Start eating better. Take in more greens instead of sweets. Eat well but not over eat. I also need to keep my body moving. Whether it is through swimming, running, or even rock-climbing. My vessel needs to stay good because it is the only one I have.

11. Fake It Until I Make It

I come from a culture that prides itself in “faking it until you make it”. However, I am not comfortable with faking anything. I am not interested in feigning interest in a conversation or a person that I do not like. However, I have to be respectful and kind. If not then I become a difficult ass that no one wants to be associated with. The question here is, how can I “fake it” while remaining sincere and kind?

12. Not Cry As Much

I cry a lot. It is just what I do. I am likely to cry over a topic I’m very passionate about. I am very likely to weep loudly during the dramatic climax of a movie. Or if I see a video about a dog and a cat becoming best friends, I will ugly cry. (But, then again, if you do not cry about interspecies becoming friends, then you have no heart.) Even so, crying is not the most socially acceptable thing to do anywhere, except a funeral. So, I need to learn to limit my tears during my adult years.

13. Weed Out and Kick Out Poisonous Friends

I have A LOT of trouble weeding out and kicking out poisonous people since whenever I get close with someone I find it hard to accept that that person is in reality a very putrid and problematic nightmare. 

I’m getting better at doing this, but I’m not great. I would like to learn how to quickly identify those toxic individuals and get them far away from me. Sadly, the world makes us learn that lesson multiple times before we grow thicker skin.

14. Be Okay With The Fact That People Will Not Always Like Me

Whenever I hear that someone does not like me, I get anxious. Why? How could they not like me? I am a delight! How dare they?! I start to get insecure and I make myself believe that their interpretation of me is who I am. Which is not fair to myself! I might not be a people-pleaser but that does not mean that I am a cruel and heartless monster! I am a multi-faceted person that requires time and love to understand. Even if that does not come across in a another person’s first impression of me! Sorry for the lack of modesty but I am like an extremely problematic TV character that everyone eventually ends up loving. 

People are more than allowed to have their opinions about me, but that does not mean that that is who I am. The only opinion about me that should matter is my own. And, the only way for me to be okay with the fact that people will not always like me is to hold myself to a high regard. I just have trouble remembering this…

15. Deal With Rude People (w/o Being Rude Back)

Gosh, rude people are the worst! They can really ruin my day. Rude people are so engrained in society, that I am becoming one of them. How do I make it stop before the metamorphosis is complete? 

16. Be Kind and Caring Without Being a Pushover

When I was younger, I would let people push me over because I was too nice to tell them to stop. Nowadays, I struggle with not being the nicest person in the room. Someday I would really like to have the reputation of someone who is genuinely kind and sincere however, I do not how to do so without becoming a pushover…

17. Hold Chopsticks Correctly

I do not know how to hold chopsticks. I’m very certain that in my future, I will be invited to eat at oriental venues and I will embarrass myself there because I cannot hold chopsticks correctly.

18. Be Okay With People Having Crushes On Me

I’m not totally okay with people having crushes on me. It is too stressful! There are so many expectations and responsibilities that go with being a crush. And, I am afraid of hurting someone’s feelings. However, I cannot let fear prevent me from welcoming something that can potentially be grand.

19. Become My Ultimate Fan

People my age tend to have a body image problem. I am no stranger to those lousy feelings. I have gotten a lot better about loving myself than how I was when I was in high school, however there is room for improvement. Such as being able to love myself even when I am not feeling my look on a particular day. Like Hailee Steinfeld says in her summer jam, “(Hey) Gonna love myself, no, I don't need anybody else”.

I need to practice being my ultimate fan until I become my ultimate fan. I know that my fan would not like me if I spend my time looking at a mirror and glaring at the parts that I do not like about myself. Because I would not be myself without my imperfections.

20. Be The Best Version of Myself

I need to aspire to be the best version of myself. But, I do not know what that entails. I would really like to know what I must do in order to become that super rad person. Hopefully, soon. 

---

Here is to another twenty years of change. Let us enjoy and relish our youth! By the way, Chvrches’s newest album “Every Open Eye” is the inspiration to this introspection of my coming of age. Their sophomore album is candid and revealing while still maintaining the band’s signature electric beats. Check it out on Spotify!

<3

- Vianey

Vianey is a twenty year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every now and then on Kaleidehscope.

Spotting the lame-Os

Excuse my cynicism, but people can suck. Sometimes it is foolish to expect people to be good.  This is why meeting new people gives me anxiety. You never know what you are going to get. You do not know if this person is going to end up being a creep or the greatest person you will ever meet. On the other hand, I have known and trusted people that became unpredictable monsters…

It is so hard to get to the point were you can trust someone! However, whenever you get close to someone, it is one of the best feelings ever! It is almost, if not equally, as great as wearing fresh-out-of-the-laundry clothes. Do not let cynicism beat you. Yet, do not totally let go of cynicism. It is a very useful tool when it comes to warding off those irrelevant lame-Os and getting close with the cool kids.

Here is a very short list on how to spot those lame-Os…

- If they have ulterior motives. 

When someone has other intentions that go past friendship, you cannot trust them.

- If they are an unsupportive friend.

If they are the kind of person that will shoot you down for being excited about something. If they belittle your intelligence. Or if they want to keep the focus on themselves, then then they are being gross grumps that do not deserve your friendship.

- If they never stand up for you.

Picture this: Your friend is talking to an acquaintance of yours. This acquaintance decides to rant about how much they do not like you. Your friend is now confronted with a moral dilemma. Do they (1) stand up for you, (2) listen and later report back to you the dirt, (3) listen and say nothing, or (4) join in on the hate-fest?

If 1, then loyal friend. If 2, a tad problematic, yet sincere weasel. If 3, then bye. People that stand for nothing are easily influenced losers. If 4, gurl bye!

- If they are constantly victimizing themselves by making you seem like the villain

Sometimes we can be the victim of a poisonous friend. However, when the “victim” is the poisonous friend, I see no point in them victimizing themselves. In addition, there is nothing great about making yourself the victim! You make yourself look weak and it is a cheap way of having people feel something for you.

-  If they are convinced that you have ulterior motives.

If you are not the real slim shady, please do not stand for someone slamming your good name.

- If they are embarrassed of you

Remember that time that you were having fun and your friend told you to cool your jets? Well, Amy Poehler said that "You can't look dumb when you're having fun", so who looks foolish now, Frank? (P.S. I don't know a Frank.)

- If they embarrass you so that they can look cooler in public

This happens whenever your friend and you are hanging out with other people and your friend (1) reminds you of the very embarrassing thing you did X years ago, (2) makes a very uncool joke about that situation in front of other people, and (3) does not realize how awful that was for you.

- If they never apologize

Any reasonable and prudent person knows that whenever one does bad they must apologize for their wrongdoing. However, if a friend is constantly adhering to condescending, rude, or awful behavior, and they do not apologize for it, then it is obvious that they are heartless sociopaths that you need to steer clear of. Do not forgive them. What is the point of forgiving them if they refuse to apologize. Screw the kindness of forgiveness!

I can only hope that with these tips you'll be able to ward of the lame-Os and have the most rocking #Squad that even Taylor Swift's squad is not able to surpass!

<3

- Vianey

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every now and then on Kaleidehscope.

Playlist: Sod Off

Sometimes people can really piss me off. (To be completely honest, I'm a little ball of anger.) So whenever I'm feeling angry, I have a select number of songs to play to reflect on the incident while I sing along to these wonderful tunes.

Note: The following songs and artists in this playlist are all considered my faves, so you should feel honored that I'm sharing them.

2nd Note: This playlist may or may not have been inspired by Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  Sue me, Whedon!

You can listen to it via Spotify.

<3

- Vianey

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every now and then on Kaleidehscope.

Playlist: Girl Power in the '90s

Ever since I've been using it, the internet has been very good in inducing nostalgia. As a child of the 1990s, I constantly see posts praising the wonderful shows, music, technology, etc. of my youth. It's wonderful seeing posts like those because I would have never realized the powerful influence these objects would carry throughout my life.

Obviously, I've changed a lot from who I was as a kid. Now, I'm more into girl power and music. Therefore, I decided to compile a playlist of how those attributes evolved in the 1990s. I might have been digging these tunes as a toddler or I might have burly uncovered them as an almost-adult. However it might be, I still enjoy listening to these women with powerful voices in these classic tunes.

You can listen to it on Spotify.

<3

- Vianey 

P.S. Try to figure out which tunes I listened to as a kid. (Hint: I was a little Mexican girl.)

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every now and then on Kaleid-Eh-Scope.

Vianey: Fav Movies

Last year, when I got the Listography book, I reflected on my favorite movies and noticed a common theme. I really love quirky romantic comedies with cool soundtracks. And, since the semester is almost over (BTW Good luck with finals! You’ll do great! I believe in you!), I wanted to share my favorite movies with you. Here are twenty of my favorites that totally hold up after watching them more than twenty times. They are in chronological order.

The Graduate (1967)

It's presence on Netflix is constantly fluctuating. Make sure to check if it's there.

The Breakfast Club (1985)

Pretty in Pink (1986)

Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

It's definitely on Netflix.

Anastasia (1997)

Totally on Netflix.

The Virgin Suicides (1999)

It's definitely on Netflix.

An Extremely Goofy Movie (1999)

Totally on Netflix.

Ratatouille (2007)

The Princess and the Frog (2009)

(500) Days of Summer (2009)

The Muppets (2011) 

Submarine (2011)

It's definitely on Netflix.

Moonrise Kingdom (2012)

The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012)

Her (2013)

This Is The End (2013)

The Spectacular Now (2013)

The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014)

Boyhood (2014)

Birdman (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) (2014)

Feel free to ask me why these movies became my favorite. And, I want to know what your favorite movies are! I need to get new faves.

Good luck with finals

- Vianey 

Bonus: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World (2010)

(Reason why it's not there: Because I forgot. Sorry this movie is perfect!)

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every now-and-then on Fridays on Kaleid-Eh-Scope.

An Honest Analysis on Crushes, Expectations, and Grand Romantic Gestures

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Even though they tend to crush your soul, crushes are nice. As depicted by this wonderful Buzzfeed video, crushes feel like…

I usually try to be very low key about my crushes since my shyness and awkwardness tends to not be endearing enough to win the affections of those I fancy. However, like most girls, I have spent various hours fantasizing an ideal future with my crushes and/or overanalyzing the most recent interaction that I’ve had with them. 

I’ll be honest, fantasizing and overanalyzing are not cute little harmless tidbits. They’re cruel and unfair thoughts to have because they create unrealistic expectations for others. It is highly unlikely for people to meet the expectations you've set for them. Not everyone is going to wow us the way that we yearn to be wowed. (Stupid ‘80s Coming-of-Age movies! They made me believe so many things. Cute boys don’t always go around making grand romantic gestures, John Hughes! (RIP) Gosh!) Once our crushes disappoint us by being human we will inevitably begin to feel devastated and disillusioned…

#SorryNotSorry Expectations are unfair for everyone. It’s a lose-lose! Take that one scene where Regina Spektor’s song “Hero” plays as Tom Hansen expects he and Summer to get back together in (500) Days of Summer. 

The accuracy in this scene is brutal! Those “secured” expectations that Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s character has going into that party ended up making him sad and depressed for a really long time. (I refuse to discuss more about this movie since I love it too much to admit it’s problematic nature.)

—————————————————————Segway—————————————————————

Let’s talk about where my unrealistic expectations of crushes come from: Grand Romantic gestures that hotties from 1980s movies did for their significant others.

I, like a large portion of the internet, love seeing pictures or videos of people doing grand romantic gestures for the ones they love. Things like creative wedding proposals or prom-posals are entertaining to watch. It warms our hearts like videos of puppies taking their first steps. However, we don’t talk much about grand romantic gestures that aren’t reciprocated without making fun of them. 

We are quick to judge and call that girl stuck-up or rude, even though we don’t know her entire situation. Maybe it was too soon for him to be proposing. Or maybe she doesn't like him anymore because he doesn't listen to what she has to say. Whatever the reason she has for turning him down by hitting him with a small guitar please be aware that being turned down is not a bad thing. Sometimes we aren’t attracted to others that might be attracted to us. It happens. Science can better explain this with the Dobler-Dahmer Theory. 

The Dobler-Dahmer Theory from How I Met Your Mother explains the effectiveness of grand romantic gesture by taking into account the most important but sometimes forgotten variable of crushes: How does the other person feels you?

"If both people are into each other, then a big romantic gesture works: Dobler, but if one person isn't into the other, the same gesture comes off serial-killer crazy: Dahmer.”

The Dobler-Dahmer Theory Hypothesis: If romantic interest is high, grand romantic gesture is more likely to be effective. Or if romantic interest is low, grand romantic gesture is more likely to be ineffective. 

(Note: The Dobler portion of the theory comes from the popular 1989 movie “Say Anything” with John Cusack portraying Lloyd Dobler. If you’re not quite sure what movie this is, it’s the movie where John Cusack is holding a boom box up high playing “In Your Eyes” by Peter Gabriel. This is Lloyd Dobler’s grand romantic gesture for his girlfriend Diane Court. It’s all very romantic.

Jeffrey Dammer, on the other hand, was an American serial killer. (Don’t google before going to sleep unless you want to be severely paranoid.))

So, let's say that you decided to take a chance and try out a grand romantic gesture with someone special.

If you took a chance and it worked. Good for you! I wish you well!

If you took a chance and it didn’t work…That sucks! However, please respect the other person’s decision. If they don’t feel the same way that you feel about them, then they don’t feel the same way that you feel about them. Contrary to what movies will tell you to do, there isn’t much you can do to change their mind. Please, don’t be creepy and leave them alone! Even though it didn’t work out, I hope that soon you’ll find someone that loves and appreciates your grand romantic gestures. Until then, I wish you well!

If someone takes a chance with you and you don’t feel the same way about them, then know that you DON’T owe them your affections. It’s flattering that they like you but, don’t feel like you’re stuck having to reciprocate your feelings. Don’t let others manipulate you into being in a relationship that you don’t want to be in! And, don’t lead others on! Be honest, stern, and unapologetic. Remember, you don’t owe anyone your affections!

—————————————————————Segway—————————————————————

Now, I will end this article with a bunch of conundrums because that is what love looks like. A bunch of nonsensical explanations that will make sense to only those that were crazy enough to take a chance and it worked.

Even though crushes are nice, they are soul crushing. It's unfair to have unrealistic expectations of others however, don't let that stop you from expecting good things will happen to you. Screw people that are quick to judge and call stuck up or a head in the clouds for your thoughts on romance. Romantic gestures are only romantic to those that want romance with you. Don't get angry or creepy whenever someone doesn't reciprocate your feelings. 

I wish you well. Now go listen to my "Realistic Crush" playlist on Spotify. This playlist is excellent for when you're crushing on someone or crushing bones. This is perhaps the most versatile playlist we've done yet. 

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<3

-Vianey

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every now on then, mostly on Friday.

A Boss Bitch's Guide to Tackling Bad Days

http://bouffantsandbrokenhearts.tumblr.com/post/73280132147/tears

There are days when you feel like what the first verses of “Be Safe” from The Cribs is describing. 

One of those fucking awful black days

When nothing is pleasing and everything that happens

Is an excuse for anger

An outlet for emotions stockpiled, an arsenal, an armour

These are the days when I hate the world

Hate the rich, hate the happy

Hate the complacent, the TV watchers

Beer drinkers, the satisfied ones

Because I know I can be all of those little hateful things

And then I hate myself for realizing that

There's no preventative, directive or safe approach for living

We each know our own fate

We know from our youth how to be treated

How we'll be received, how we shall end

These things don't change

You can change your clothes

Change your hairstyle, your friends, cities, continents

But sooner or later your own self will always catch up

How is it that The Cribs captured the thought process one goes through during a bad day so well? They even took a philosophical approach towards addressing it. They’re absolutely right! Bad days are immensely daunting. It’s very easy to feel defeated. Your thoughts and feelings will cloud your mind instead of drawing attention to all the greatness in your life. You will torture yourself by over-thinking your situation. You’ll even regret getting out of bed. 

Instead of dealing with your problems head on, your unforgiving pity party is going to tear you apart. You’re probably rolling your eyes at how easy it is to say “deal with your problems” instead of actually dealing with said problems. (Or you might roll your eyes at how annoying and cliche the previous sentence was.) So, why do we feel like that? What can we do to get to the bottom of this? What is the best way of addressing our feelings other than just internalizing the anger and passively-aggressively and lashing out on others over time?

1. Figure Out All The Factors That Are Contributing To Your Feelings

It’s best to take a step back to gather your thoughts together before you act on what you want to do. It’s prudent to be fully aware of the kind of situation you’re dealing with. 

1. Think about everything that might or should be a part of the problems.
   
   (Including the Notable aspects, the indifferent situations, and the awkward sections. Even if they make you cringe. (This is for your best! I'm 100% sure that you’re tough enough to handle thinking about the embarrassing.)
   
2. Sort out all your thoughts.
   
3. Keep your thoughts compiled into a memory file.
   
4. Try to see all possible perspectives from the situation.

Consider asking yourself the following questions…

Why am I feeling like this? Did someone do me wrong? Did I do wrong to someone? Am I mad? Am I sad? Am I upset? Am I disappointed? Am I annoyed? Could this have been avoided? Could I have done something different? Could this be angst? Has this been slowly brewing for a while? How valid is my perspective on the situation? What else is happening in my life that could be contributing to my current emotions? What bad things are happening in my life right now? What good things are happening in my life right now? How do I benefit from confronting this situation? How do I not benefit from confronting this situation? Could this be fixed? If so, how could this be fixed? How long? Is this for the best? What does "best" even mean in this situation?

Depending on the situation or people that put you in this mood, remember that you're not being “insane” or “dramatic” or “unnecessarily sensitive” for feeling lousy. Those nasty adjectives are specifically crafted comments said in order to make us feel silly or guilty for noticing something wrong in our lives. Don’t let others manipulate your feelings. You’re more than allowed to feel undervalued, inadequate, or empty. And, you need to address this issue before it eats you alive.

2. Remind Yourself That You Are A Boss Bitch

http://vnareyes.tumblr.com/post/112954298065/thatgaykidonline-my-all-time-favorite-singer

I think Kate Nash explained it best in the gifs above. 

Portray confidence for the sake of yourself. If someone happens to credit your thoughts and opinions more due to your self-assurance than that’s great. If someone takes your confidence as arrogance and uses it to discredit your opinion, then they can fuck off. 

Bonus Tip: If you need help portraying confidence, or require a support team, I suggest that you once again take advice from the wonderful Kate Nash and start a Girl Gang. Contrary to one might believe, a girl gang is not a group of temptresses that go around breaking hearts. (Although that sounds like an amazing and intriguing story idea.) It’s kinda of a support group were girls (or boys) get together and talk about everything that they need to talk about. You can learn more from the Youtube video below.

3. Say What You Want To Say

Sometimes women (or men) are too polite to be upfront about upsetting news. Once it gets to the point were you want to say what you gotta say, you need to say what you want to say. And, let the words flow out. Honestly, I want to see you be brave!  (Make sure to only discuss the things that make you feel comfortable sharing or asserting.)

Consider this SNL sketch as an inspiration to be honest and unapologetic about your opinions/thoughts. 

(EDIT: So apparently SNL, being the private dicks they are, decided to take down their video. And, I can't find another version of it.)

You don’t necessarily need to be nice but, you do have to be kind. No low blows. No cheap shots. No matter how creative you might think they are. Once you start name calling or pointing out other people’s insecurities, you’ve completely stopped being civil and you become the bad guy. Take what Tom Hanks's character confesses in You’ve Got Mail, “I must warn you that when you finally have the pleasure of saying the thing you mean to say at the moment you mean to say it, remorse inevitably follows.”

Hoping you all embody your inner Boss Bitch,

- Vianey

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every Friday on Kaleid-Eh-Scope.

Art Inspired by the wonderfully great Kate Nash <3

That's Not My Name

(http://i.ytimg.com/vi/ExeDBe9eCxY/hqdefault.jpg)

Parents are given the most special and influential task when they bring a child into the world. They must name them. (And, to raise them. I guess.) Even though names are just sounds that we associate with people, they are big factors in deciding the kind of person we are going to become. (I’m not going to get into the common misconceptions and stereotypes of different names because that’s messy.) This is the story with my name.

When I was born, my parents decided to not name me after any of the 200 most common female names of 1995. They chose to name me with this obscure Mexican name, in addition to giving it a very uncommon spelling. My name became Vianey. Pronounced like Vee-uh-nay.

As a kid, I was embarrassed and annoyed of my name. It was too unique! No one knew how to say it correctly. People constantly misspelled it. Sometimes, they would even plead to call me by a different name. (There was no way out of my God-given first name since I have no middle name.) This would happen everywhere! Teachers, peers, host, and hostesses would butcher my name. People who have unique names, or unique spellings of common names, should know what I mean. If not, then Buzzfeed should give you the insight you require.

As my tastes and personality matured, I began to appreciate the uniqueness of my name. My name made me feel like an individual who stood above the basic. In my eyes, I had the best and coolest identity because of my name. Some of the things that I like about my name include that half of the letters are vowels, it looks cute written in cursive, and people rarely have to ask “which Vianey?” when I’m brought up in conversations. (I don’t care if that might have negative connotations.)

However, like most things in my life, everything great doesn’t last. When I got to high school, I realized that there was about four girls with the same name as me. From there, the uniqueness of my name was stripped away from me… People had already learned the easy way of pronouncing my name, which is saying my name like DNA but with a V instead of a D. Even though there was still some people that would add an extra “N” to the spelling of my name, they would quickly fix their mistake… I sincerely yearned to correct people. (I’m not demented! It’s just that you do something all your life and all of a sudden it stops, you miss doing it.)

I slowly began to deal with this. I was not as unique as I thought I was. That’s cool, I guess… But then, an additional turning point of life with my name occurred. At my university, I have many professors that are not native to my city, El Paso, TX. (A city with a predominately large Hispanic/Latino/a population.) Since they hail from places like Pennsylvania, San Antonio, Turkey, England, one might assume that they’ve never heard my name. And, this was assumed correctly. When they would take row, they could not, for the sake of their life, say my name. One specific professor, who has Hispanic and Irish roots in her, doesn’t even try to pronounce my name, no matter how many times I have explained it to her. (She takes row in every class. It’s halfway through the semester. This is agony, son.)

Yes, this whole rant is based on these situations. It’s annoying. My point here is that if I’m going to try in your class, you better try with my name. Like Mindy Kaling eloquently puts it in her book, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?, 

“I don’t think it should be socially acceptable for people to say they are “bad with names.” No one is bad with names. That is not a real thing. Not knowing people’s names isn’t a neurological condition; it’s a choice. You choose not to make learning people’s names a priority. It’s like saying, “Hey, a disclaimer about me: I’m rude.””

http://theduanewells.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/Mindy-Kaling-Book-Cover.jpg 

I’m glad that there are at least three professors so far in my collegiate education who have succeeded in pronouncing my name, but there are still ways to go.

Even though sometimes I wish I could have a common name, I immediately regret that wish and I go back to loving my name. Sure, it might suck to have to constantly correct people, but I like correcting people. The biggest downside I see to my name is that there might never be a love song with my name in it. Regardless, my name is rad! It’s my main identity and I’m not shedding it, ever. Even my grave will showcase the uniqueness of it for generations to enjoy. (In addition, there has been people who have loved my name so badly that their children's names became younger copycats of my name. So, I'm the main trendsetter.)

<3

- Vianey A.K.A. The Trendsetter

Bonus: There was this 1960s Mexican singer who did Spanish covers of The Beatles with my name. (Correct spelling and everything.) Here is her cover of "Twist and Shout". 

(This makes me so happy because of five reasons. (1) I love The Beatles. (2) I love Ferris Bueller's Day Off. (3) This cover is made in my first language. (4) She has my name. (5) She is wearing cute clothes in the album cover.)

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every Friday on Kaleid-Eh-Scope.

Uninspired DIY: Writing Letters in 2015

(http://chifladazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/moonrise-kingdom-2.jpg)

I realize that many of you know how to write letters and believe that writing letters should be a basic understanding within the world. However, ever since the emergence of the internet, people don’t need to write letters as much as we used to. The internet makes communication with those far from us easy, fast, and free. 

Nevertheless, there is something special and personable about writing letters to someone that you care about. Take Sam Shakusky’s and Suzy Bishop’s love affair in Wes Anderson’s Moonrise Kingdom (2012). It was innocent and sweet, and it all started out with correspondence letters between the two. 

(https://hypethemovies.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/moonrise-kingdom-suzy-and-sam.jpeg)

Writing letters is a nice gesture that doesn’t need require romance to be special. They can be send to your friends, parents, enemies…

As of lately, some of my friends have moved away. It’s hard to keep in touch. We all have school. Therefore, I figured that letter writing was a nice sentiment to use as compensation. The letters will remind my pal about the great aspects of our friendship as well as serving as a medium for miscellaneous conversations. (Although, I haven’t really gotten around to writing any, I did buy the materials I needed for writing and I also informed myself on how to mail them.) Therefore, I’d like to share with you the ways to write and send letters in 2015. 

Bonus: I also included a playlist so that you can have fun with this process. (Yes, this playlist totally features the score from Moonrise Kingdom to spike productivity.)

Materials 

• Paper
• Pen
• Envelopes
• Stamp(s)
• Pictures (if applicable)

(There are many ways to get these materials. The simpler solutions would be to just buy a stationery set, or buy a one dollar pack of fifty envelopes, or simply get the paper from the printer. However, since I yearn to be cute and I couldn’t find any inexpensively cute stationery sets, I decided to customize my letters with adorable materials that I found at Office Depot. Which include these cloud-printed envelopes and these pink-colored sheets of paper.)

Instructions

1. Think of something to write and write it.

Thinking of content to have in your letter might be somewhat overwhelming. It’s like, “What aspects of my life do I share with you, friend?” Well, I’ve taken it upon myself to help you ease the brainstorming process with a nice and simple outline. (Do remember that you don’t have to follow this outline because you’re an individual and you can make your own decisions. All of these are just suggestions.)
Don't forget to be as honest and frank with your writing. We all appreciate humblebrags but remember that you're writing to your pal, not your enemy.

a. Introduction

It's up to you to decide the content of the introduction. Fret not guys, you do not require a thesis. Letters can definitely act as “Lonely Scattered Thoughts”. (A word Kristal coined in her article about theses.)  

Maybe start off by reminding the person about your appreciation and love towards them before you get to the nitty gritty.

b. Recall past event that you shared with the one that will receive the letter
This is made so that the other person remembers how much they appreciate and miss hanging out with you.

c. Anecdote(s)
Anecdotes are fun because they create a connection of happiness and nostalgia between you two. 

d. Updates
Share with your friend the new updates of your life. Don’t be afraid of getting deep and real with them.

e. Offer suggestions and ask hypothetical situations
This is all part of the pretty scheme that makes the other person correspond back.

f. Conclude
Say what you must to wrap up your thoughts.

I wrote a sample letter showcasing the usefulness of this outline. You can see it below. (Or if the print is too small for your eyes then you can read the letter and all of its contents here.)

2. (Optional) Include pictures, magazine scraps, newspaper scraps, CD’s, etc..

Envelopes can secure within themselves our letters and whatever images we decide to attach. Just remember that if you do include an attachment please explain it for whoever your writing for. You don’t want the person to end up confused by the image you provide. (Unless you want them to end up confused.) For example, in the sample letter that I provided above, I included a photo that I found of my mom being a fashion blogger before it was cool. I made sure to explain the image within the letter so that my friend doesn't end up confused.

3. Insert the letter and all attachments in the envelope

Basic tip: Fold your letter(s) like you would fold a flyer.

4. Seal it in an envelope

Lick the seal. Or add cool holographic stickers because the glue from the seal tastes gross.

Money Saving Tip: If you’re using the U.S. Postal Service make sure you’re using a rectangular envelopes to mail your letter. Square envelopes, doesn't matter if they're smaller in size than some rectangular envelopes, are more expensive to mail.

5. Add the Addresses

It’s crucial to know the address of the person that you’re sending the letter to. If not then there is no point of writing the letter because they will never get it. 

Their address goes in the middle of the envelope. The format of placing the address goes as follows. (This format is solely used for the correspondence of people living in the United States)

Person’s Name

Address 

(P.O. Box if applicable)

City, State, Zip Code

On the left hand side of the envelope should be the return address. Or were you put your address. This format is the same as the first one.

Your Name

Address

(P.O. Box if applicable)

City, State, Zip Code

6. Stamp it

(This is the most boring and expensive part of letter writing.) Stamps are a fee used by the Postal Service which signifies that your letter is ready for mailing. Each stamp has a specific estimated value and it also serves as a measuring device to see how much weight your letter hold. Letters that are within 1 oz. only require one stamp. If your letter is heavier, you may require additional stamps.

There are different ways in which you can get the stamps. Your local Walgreens probably carries $9.20 stamp booklets that have 20 stamps within them. Or if you go to your local Postal Service they’ll charge you $0.49 per stamp.

(This was so boring to write.)

7. Mail it. 

Place letter(s) in the nearest Blue Mailbox to you.

---

I hope you all have fun writing your letters. If it all fails then that's fine. You can always use social media or email. (However, if you're using email then, you're definitely stuck in the 1990s). 

<3

- Vianey

Vianey is a nineteen year old self-identified ranter who can be easily wooed by funny three-dimensional TV characters. When she is not watching sitcoms, bugging her pets, or dancing sporadically she posts every Friday on Kaleid-Eh-Scope.